I Want

I want to write about how I’m aggressively unmotivated to do anything concerning progression in my degree. I want to write about how completely unattached to my family I feel I have become. So blissfully and yet painfully unattached. I want to write about how I have no feelings of sadness or grief associated with losing those around me to the real world. Especially with regard to one specific female who once was my best and has recently become my nothing. I want to write about the all-consuming, soul-devouring, euphoric love I feel for him. I want to write about how being apart makes me a bitter spiteful little thing. I want to write about how I obsess about every other freckle, every note of laughter, every intake of air, every inch of life, every pigment of his eyes, every damn thing about him.

I want to write but most importantly I just want to live



Yep. I’ve been away for literal years blah blah sorry etc and so on.

A few posts back I mentioned that I had fallen heavily for a boy after a uno-nighto-stando who played laura marlz on guitar for me the morning after and proclaimed that this was not how a ‘love story’ starts. Big news is that I have now celebrated my 7 month anniversary with this same boyo! SEVEN MONTHS PEOPLE! That is a ridiculous land mark for me. I’ve never been able to have a steady relationship for that long with anything never mind anyONE.

We have since even been to see laura marling in birmingham! I’m grossing you out aren’t I? And the maccabees and lucy rose and an we would have seen Bombay Bicycle Club if we hadn’t got in a big car crash (that wrote off his cue car clive) on the way!

I disgust myself with how much I like him.